The Dog's Life Your wagging tail Makes me happy Just to see. Lying in the sun, Totally relaxed. May I join you? Lying on the couch, Chewing your rag toy, Blissfully. Barking and wagging, You look for something To bark at. When I arrive home, You meet me, wagging, So happy. -MW A Piccogram a day: To lick tears away speaks more than words can ever say. Lift your paw, make your eyes entreat, and you will likely get a treat. Whine to dine. A treat deferred is entreaty unheard. The simple pleasures of life are the best: chewing on a bone, sleeping in my nest. Live in the present. Backpacks often hold a gift To give one a lift. | My Wishes They Are Whenever I am dining, Don't let me hear you whining. Your treats are on the floor, A dog needs nothing more. Keep lifting paws for goodies, Extending your sniffing snout, Handouts are here for the asking, But only if done with panache. Pockets are private caches Not dens that hide your prey. Kerchiefs are for noses, And not for you to tear. Stop running around in circles And with craft to avoid being caught. Your stag-like bounds in contrast Are a sight to behold. Mouth but do not eat The slippers on my feet, Tatter what you will But eaten tatters kill. Drop what daily you must Outside on grass or dust And not on floor or rug. Heed well or I'll you bug. Softly bark and rarely, Gently bite and sparely, Stop chewing on that stick And when I call, be quick. Would that you could talk, Or would that I could bark, What a joy 'twould be For both you and me. -JM Memo to Píccola Keep bounding like a stag, Keep snuggling like a cat, Keep squirming that lean body, Keep wagging that black tail. Keep searching, sniffing, gnawing, Keep giving me your paw, Keep dragging in the paper, Keep seeking out my bed, Keep crawling under covers, Keep doing it outdoors, Keep greeting Midi warmly And your food eat, not mine, My canine Lilliputian, My stubborn tiny ward, Whose needs I gladly meet And who responds in kind. -JM |
I have been living with you for six years now. I love you dearly but, try as I might, I still cannot understand much of your behavior. You humans make things so complicated and you talk so much. So, I thought perhaps it was time for me to give you some dog advice:
Know what you want. Even better, know how to obtain it.
Listen for a few key words. When you hear “treat” or “eat” run to the kitchen.
Food trumps all. Go into the kitchen anytime you hear someone there. There might be a treat.
Begging will get you everywhere and everything. Just hold up your paw and make your eyes liquid and slightly sad. Whine a bit if necessary. Come to think of it, I don’t see this working with humans. Maybe because we dogs are way more cute.
Routine is good. It is soothing. I do not like my routine being upset, unless it is for a really fun activity. I will always interrupt my routine for food.
Learn to focus. But remain alert at the same time. When I am chewing my bone, I am totally focused on that bone. But the slightest noise will put me on the alert and I will jump up to bark and scare away the intruder.
Get over anger quickly. If you disturb my chewing or try to take away what I am eating, I will growl and even nip, but then it is over and we are friends again.
Never poop on the rug. This is a no-no! Humans don’t like it. Although I don’t know why. Rugs are soft, even better than the lawn, because sometimes the grass itches.
Try quiet watchfulness. Just sit and watch out the window like I do.
Try silence. Just sit by me on the couch, watching, listening. There is no need to talk.
Chase cats and squirrels. You won’t catch them but it is fun and you get exercise.
If you hurt someone, apologize. Don’t make excuses, don’t deny it, don’t blame them. Just lick their face, put on a hang-dog expression, and grovel. This dissolves anger quickly.
Human beds are much better than dog beds. Always seek out a human bed. It is even better when a human is in it.
Exploring outside is fun. Sniffing is good. Try it sometime. There are many enticing smells out there.
Wag your tail. It makes you happy and it makes those around you happy. Oops, I forgot.You don’t have a tail. Well, try smiling then.
Barking is fun. Barking is communication. But I know you don’t like it. So I’ll try to curb it just for you. If you will stop talking so much.
Enjoy life. Don’t analyze so much. Be in the here and now. Just sit back and relax. Lie in the sun. When it gets too hot, move to the shade.
Offer love and affection without expecting anything in return.
I eat and eat. I don’t know why I do. Then you weigh me and tell me I have to eat less.
I guess I have some things to learn from you also. Maybe we can teach each other. Could you teach me self-discipline, so I don’t eat so much, so I only poop outside even if it is raining and cold, so I don’t bark at every little sound?
So, dear human, keep feeding me, pet me, take me on walks, let me sit by you on the couch, let me out when I whine then back in then out again then in again… let me sleep in your bed. And in return, I will greet you enthusiastically every time you come home, I will clean you with my tongue, I will sit by you on the couch, and I will warm you in bed. I will even let you share my bone or chew rag if you wish. And I will offer you unconditional love forever.
-Píccola